Having been pestered for so long about how I'm "addicted" to coffee I've decided to prove once and for all that drinking coffee makes you a better Christian.
-All those Bible verses that command us to be watchful andsober clearly imply that we have to be awake. And what better way to stay awake (i.e. be spiritual) than to drink coffee.
-Coffee allows you to do spiritual things faster and with more energy.
-Who can argue that morning devotions are much more impactful after a good dose of caffeine?
-When the Sunday morning sermon goes long and the content is as dull as plastic spoon, it's the coffee drinkers who stay awake.
-Coffee drinkers are accustomed to making tough decisions on a morning-to-morning basis...like creamer versus no creamer.
-Speaking of creamer, coffee is black and creamer is white and thus is clearly symbolizes the old nature/new nature conflict (metaphor...stretching...).
-Coffee comes from a bean and a bean is a plant and God made plants.